In the Bedroom and Thoughts On Safety

Today we're talking Boudoir and nude photography, which seems only too appropriate for how recent Valentines was to us. Before we begin, however, I feel there's a serious discussion we need to touch on related to this part of the industry.

A few months ago, a friend had brought a pretty awful story to my attention, regarding a photographer who was being accused by multiple people of sexual misconduct during photo sessions, mostly sets that involved nudity or lingerie. As these are, as of yet, allegations and not entirely proven in a court of law, I will refrain from naming names here, but I wish I could say this was the first time I've heard of a photographer behaving in such a way.

I wish I could assure you, dear readers, that professionalism is a guarantee of safety. I wish I could tell a swimsuit model, who works exclusively with female photographers because she's afraid of being accosted in some way by a male professional, is being paranoid. I wish I could say the threat of ruined reputation and legal action could keep the creeps and monsters on the social leashes they so obviously need.

But I can't. The honest truth that most of us already know is you can never be 100% who to trust with such sensitive work. If you're interested in boudoir, nudes, or any kind of photography that requires more vulnerability than normal, this can be incredibly unnerving.

So for today, I'd like to take a moment and step out of the photographer's shoes and into the subject's. I'd like to offer actions that will keep you in control of the situation so as to protect yourself from any situation in which a predator may be masquerading as a professional. These are not end-all, beat-all answers, so I welcome any more tips and precautions to be shared in the comments.

1.) Bring a trusted friend or significant other

This is a simple one, and probably one of the most effective at keeping away any creeping or shady behavior. Having a plus-one to simply hang around shouldn't be a problem with any photographer, as long as you establish this ahead of time. If they refuse because of this request, treat that as a red flag and move on.

2.) Contact past clients if possible, or look for reviews online

A lot of protogs have shitty web presences (I mean, look at me), so lack of reviews should not immediately be treated as "lack of credibility." But when available, find out what people say about the pro in question. Assuming he's done this kind of shoot with others before, what is the general vibe they say he/she gives off?

3.) Ensure you are clear and concise about your expectations regarding your comfort

As you correspond with your photographer in the days leading up to your session, be sure to communicate, very clearly, what both of you want from these photos. If they ask you to do anything that you are absolutely NOT comfortable with, refuse to do it. You don't need to be nasty at first; simply inform them you are uncomfortable with what they asked. If they're any kind of decent professional (or, you know, a decent person), they should understand, back off, and move to the next idea.

If they continue to push, plant your feet and firmly reiterate that NO, it's not gonna happen. Stay in control of the session. If they still won't let up, that's where the next step comes in.

4.) If, for any reason, you feel threatened or unsafe, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY

I've given this advice before, and was met with "But what if I already payed him/signed my contract/whatever else?" Trust me, all those points are details that can be handled LATER. First order of business is getting somewhere safe. Money is not as or more important than your well-being, and in situations like this you should always trust your intuition and GET. OUT.



Thanks for baring with me, and I hope these ideas help someone out there stay a little safer. So without further ado, let's get to the pretty pictures.

These come from a recent set for burlesque performer, and my beautiful wife, Ellie Camino (who's website you can find here). The majority were taken on a large bed with beautiful translucent drapes hanging from the ceiling. I started with a soft box, but those hanging drapes worked in my favor in an unexpected way. Simply shooting hard light through them served to soften the light a bit (Ellie's skin takes hard light pretty well to begin with, so a tiny bit of softening was all that was needed), and caused light shadows wherever the fabric creased.

Look at this (edited for Blogger) shot. See the streaks of shadow on our model? Almost looks like light coming from a rainy window? Gorgeous, and was a neat lesson to keep in the ol' brain case.

That lesson being; take some sheer fabric with you everywhere. It's light, easy to store, and could make for very interesting lighting.

Now, since I started off with some tips for anyone interested in being the subject of boudoir photography, I figure I should end with a couple of thoughts from the photographer's perspective. As with the safety advice, these are by no means unquestionable wisdom, but I do have a few thoughts to share when it comes to conduct and behavior.

Most of these will probably cater to male photographers over females. I can't help the bias here, as it's the only perspective I have, but I still hope there's something to gleam for everybody who wants to pick up a camera and take shots of naked people.

1.) Relax

I know so many people that talk about how this variety of the art form would make them so nervous to do, because "I'm afraid of coming off as a creep!"

Dude, that anxiety is what's going to make you LOOK like a creep. It's not entirely your fault, but it's a pretty normal reaction when someone is fidgety and nervous to think, "What does he have to be nervous about? I thought he was a professional!" And if they read my advice above, they're in their rights to end the session and leave before you even get set up.

Number one way to avoid coming off as creepy is to be calm, confident, and...well, not creepy. I understand this is difficult for some people, but if worrying about how you come off to others is a major problem you struggle with, I suggest dealing with more straightforward portraiture until you can build that confidence.

2.) Understand and Respect Boundaries

This is probably a no-brainer to most folks, but it's imperative to understand how fragile and vulnerable in can feel to be nude in front of another human being, especially a stranger. Even a veteran of boudoir, like a professional model or burlesque performer, should be treated with the utmost care and respect for their personal boundaries.

My experience has taught me that directing a client with questions rather than commands works wonders when the clothes come off. If you usually pose clothed subjects with sentences like, "Move like this," or "Put your arm here," try instead to phrase it as "What do you think about posing like this?" or "Could you please move your leg over just a bit?"

This sounds like semantics, but it's giving your client the space and control to say "No" if they want to. It comes from a place of respect and cooperation, which is important in any environment, but especially in this scenario. It can also build the trust you need for these shots if your client knows they are in control of the environment.


I'm sure this subject will come up again in the future, but I hope my ramblings have given anyone interested in the field something to mull over.

Thanks again (and many "I love yous") to Ellie Camino for allowing me to share these shots. If you're interested in seeing her next performance, or if you'd like to book her for an event of some kind, you can find all of that information on her website (https://www.elliecamino.com/).

Thanks for reading, and stay safe out there!